During Yoga (the physical practice), I'm drawn to the parts of my body that signal discomfort, tension, or some kind of pain. Discomfort and tension are part of growth; your flexibility or strength will not increase without them. If pain is present, a realignment is needed; otherwise, you might hurt yourself.
In daily life, it's the same story: discomfort and tension are part of growth. Pain, on the other hand, is a signal that something is wrong, that realignment is needed. In daily life, our outward attention can be drawn to specific details in an event that signal pain or discomfort.
Think of, for instance, when you go to a park that's full of people—it's summer, after all! Your attention is limited; you can't take it all in at the same time. You might be drawn to a specific person, a specific group of people, a specific interaction, or a detail in that scene. And what's deciding what draws your attention? This is most probably an unconscious process, at least at first. In Yoga, when your attention is drawn to a specific part of your body, it's good to ask: what's this message trying to convey? Is it tension? Is it discomfort? Is it pain? In the same way, when your attention is drawn to a specific detail in an event, it's good to ask: why is this particular detail (among hundreds, or thousands of others) drawing my attention? Is this causing discomfort, tension, or pain? Is it feeling good? And, as in Yoga, there might be something to learn from it. It is well known, especially for journalists, that the easiest way to draw attention from readers is through negative headlines, which exploit our need to feel safe and to fix what's needed to guarantee our survival.
If the communication with your own body is not deep enough, it won't be until it hurts that you notice something is wrong. What does this imply for outward attention? If we don't notice the subtle signs that we need for growth in our everyday life, a huge, shaking event will be needed to call our attention to the need to change, to realign our lives to avoid pain, physical or emotional. It seems to be the way life has to say "Hey, you need to change something here!" And if you don't, guess what? It will keep coming back—the same situation, the same challenge that will help us grow and "learn our lesson."
Yoga is very useful for improving communication with your body. Sometimes we might not even notice that we're hungry or tired and end up creating an argument with the people around us just because we have an unsatisfied physical need that we're not aware of. If we listen better to our bodies, we might recognize: "Ok! I'm hungry/tired. Let me eat some snack or get a nap before I go to this important meeting with my team." But it gets better—next time when there's an emotional reaction, you'll be able to catch and notice the physical response. If you get angry, your heartbeat might start rising, you might notice how you stopped breathing, maybe even feel a compression in your chest, and once you notice this, before reacting out of anger, you can tell yourself: "Ok. Anger is here. It's a good time to take a deep breath, to ask for some time to process the information that is being given before I respond." Anger, or any other emotional or physical reaction, is a source of information that comes to your conscious awareness. It is signaling that something doesn't seem quite right, and it's good to take this information into account when deciding on an appropriate response. Why am I feeling angry? Are my boundaries being violated? Is my voice being suppressed? Are my values or belief system being challenged? And if so, why does it bother me so much?
During a Yoga class, the instructor (especially if they're experienced) will direct your attention to different sensations in your body. This not only serves as an anchor to the present but also creates a frame of reference. The cue "Notice how your belly expands when you inhale" might come to you when you stop breathing. There will not be an instructor saying that, but your memory bringing the cue: "Notice, your belly is NOT expanding. Why did you stop breathing?" Or "Release the tension in your shoulders" might become later: "I'm holding tension in my shoulders. What's creating this tension? Let me roll my shoulders back and see that tension dissipate."
These are just a couple of ways in which Yoga can help practitioners become more aware of their own emotions through the physical practice. It has helped me for sure, and it might help you as well!
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